Written By Jerome Segers
Posted on August 27th, 2007
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It always happens.. with every passing generation, we have to realize MTV just sucks. These days, they barely play music videos, and when they do, it's of major artists that are beyond established. Hell, even MTV2 is starting to do the same shit. I actually find myself having a better time watching BET of all things.
The entire station seems kinda "meh," with shows like TRL being boring and pretty much irrelevant. I haven't watched that mess since 2000 (the last year boy bands were huge) and forgot it still comes on lol. Who needs MTV when you got YouTube, right?
MTV wants to shake up things up due to (rightfully) declining viewership. So this year's VMAs will, get this, only air ONCE. Yep, no more replays 200 times a day. I covered last year's show, but I don't think anyone bothered to read it as it was 9 pages long lol. I took that one off line -- even if it took me nearly a week to compile -- but this year's recap will be much shorter. I can't promise A.D.D. friendly, but compared to last year's it'll seem short lol. Now on to the nominees!
BEST GROUP
Fall Out Boy
Gym Class Heroes
Linkin Park
Maroon 5
The White Stripes
Paq's Prediction: Gym Class Heroes, the little teenagers will vote for them lol -- watch.
And maybe I'm out of touch with rock, but what the hell have The White Stripes done lately that's so damn great?
BEST NEW ARTIST
Lily Allen
Gym Class Heroes
Peter Bjorn & John
Carrie Underwood
Amy Winehouse
Paq's Prediction: I want to say Carrie Underwood considering she's sold 6 million copies of "Some Hearts" and "Before He Cheats" is my mofuggin' JAM, but since this is MTV and not CMT, I gotta go with Amy Winehouse here... Assuming she doesn't kill herself before the awards.
FEMALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR
Beyoncé
Fergie
Nelly Furtado
Rihanna
Amy Winehouse
Paq's Prediction: As much as Nathena hates her, I'm going with Fergie. You gotta remember this is MTV and people are generally idiots on this channel. Haha, I'm not picking who I *want* to win, but who I think will win. There's a difference :) Under any other circumstance *cough* BET *cough* I'd say Beyoncé.
MALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR
Akon
Robin Thicke
T.I.
Justin Timberlake
Kanye West
Paq's Prediction: Again, this is MTV. Considering he's nominated for seven other awards, my bet is on Justin Timberlake.
How is Kanye even nominated? The dude just started his grind again..
MONSTER SINGLE OF THE YEAR
Daughtry - "Home"
Fall Out Boy - "Thnks Fr Th Mmrs"
Avril Lavigne - "Girlfriend"
Lil' Mama - "Lip Gloss"
Mims - "This Is Why I'm Hot"
Plain White T's - "Hey There Delilah"
Rihanna feat. Jay-Z - "Umbrella"
Shop Boyz - "Party Like A Rock Star"
T-Pain feat. Yung Joc "Buy U A Drank (Shawty Snappin')
Timbaland feat. Keri Hilson, D.O.E., & Sebastian - "The Way I Are"
Paq's Prediction: How the hell can a category have 10 fucking nominees?! *sigh* Well, some of these songs are too new to be considered anything "of the year" (Plain White T's, Timbaland) and some are too annoying (Avril, Lil' Mama), so I'm going to go with Rihanna. "Umbrella" is freakin' huge.
MOST EARTH-SHATTERING COLLABORATION
Akon feat. Eminem - "Smack That"
Beyoncé feat. Shakira - "Beautiful Liar"
Gwen Stefani feat. Akon - "The Sweet Escape"
Justin Timberlake feat. Timbaland - "SexyBack"
U2 feat. Green Day - "The Saints Are Coming"
Paq's Prediction: If this was a VH1 show, I could see U2 and Green Day winning since that fits their audience better, but again, teenagers with acne are in charge of the voting, not intelligent people with refined tastes in audio. I totally see Timberlake taking home another one, but not totally because of the middle school vote. I thought "SexyBack" was nuts the first time I heard it and didn't expect it from either Justin nor Timbaland.
QUADRUPLE THREAT OF THE YEAR
Beyoncé
Bono
Jay-Z
Justin Timberlake
Kanye West
Paq's Prediction: What the fuck is a "quadruple threat"? Just because I'm not entirely sure, I'm picking Jay-Z since that fool hustles like a mofo.
VIDEO OF THE YEAR
Beyoncé - "Irreplaceable"
Justice - "D.A.N.C.E."
Rihanna feat. Jay-Z - "Umbrella"
Justin Timberlake - "What Goes Around... Comes Around"
Kanye West - "Stronger"
Amy Winehouse - "Rehab"
Paq's Prediction: I don't even know what the criteria for being "video of the year" is. Original concept? Editing? Song? What?? I'll take a stab in the dark and say Timberlake again since that video was like nine minutes long and looked expensive lol.
BEST CHOREOGRAPHY
Beyoncé feat. Shakira - "Beautiful Liar"
Chris Brown - "Wall To Wall"
Ciara - "Like A Boy"
Eve - "Tambourine"
Justin Timberlake - "My Love"
Paq's Prediction: I hate his ass, but Chris Brown can dance his fucking head off. I can see "Wall To Wall" being the darkhorse here and taking the win.
BEST DIRECTOR
Christina Aguilera - "Candy Man" (Matthew Rolston)
Beyoncé feat. Shakira - "Beautiful Liar" (Jake Nava)
Kanye West - "Stronger" (Hype Williams)
Linkin Park - "What I've Done" (Joe Hahn)
Rihanna feat. Jay-Z - "Umbrella" (Chris Applebaum)
Justin Timberlake - "What Goes Around... Comes Around" (Samuel Bayer)
Paq's Prediction: I'm going to say Matthew Rolston's "Candy Man" project with Christina Aguilera. That was an inventive video with a cool World War II era theme that totally worked with the song.
Which I hate with a passion by the way.
There's a best editing catergory, but who gives a shit lol. I'm sick of typing :)
So there you have it. Be sure to check back in a week a two for the full show report!
The 2007 VMAs air on Sept. 9th.
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